第1章

I

Therearealwaystwowaysoflookingatathing，frequentlytherearesixorseven;buttwowaysoflookingataLondonfogarequiteenough。Whenitisthickandyellowinthestreetsandstingsaman’sthroatandlungsashebreathesit，anawakeningintheearlymorningiseitheranunearthlyandgrewsome，oramysteriouslyenclosing，secluding，andcomfortablething。Ifoneawakensinahealthybody，andwithaclearbrainrestedbynormalsleepandretainingmemoriesofanormallyagreeableyesterday，onemayliewatchingthehousemaidbuildingthefire;

andaftershehassweptthehearthandputthingsinorder，liewatchingtheflamesoftheblazingandcracklingwoodcatchthecoalsandsetthemblazingalso，anddancingmerrilyandfillingcornerswithaglow;andinsolyingandrealizingthatleapinglightandwarmthandasoftbedaregoodthings，onemayturnoveronone’sback，stretchingarmsandlegsluxuriously，drawingdeepbreathsandsmilingataknowledgeofthefogoutsidewhichmakeshalf—pasteighto’clockonaDecembermorningasdarkastwelveo’clockonaDecembernight。Undersuchconditionsthesoft，thick，yellowgloomhasitspicturesqueandevenhumorousaspect。

Onefeelsenclosedbyitatoncefantasticallyandcosily，andisinclinedtorevelinimaginingsofthepictureoutside，itsRembrandtlightsandorangeyellows，thehalosaboutthestreet—lamps，theilluminationofshop—

windows，theflareoftorchesstuckupovercosterbarrowsandcoffee—

stands，theshadowsonthefacesofthemenandwomensellingandbuyingbesidethem。Refreshedbysleepandcomfortandsurroundedbylight，warmth，andgoodcheer，itiseasytofacetheday，toconfrontgoingoutintothefogandfeelingasortofpleasureinitsmysteries。Thisisonewayoflookingatit，butonlyone。

Theotherwayismarkedbyenormousdifferences。

Aman——hehadgivenhisnametothepeopleofthehouseasAntonyDart——awakenedinathird—storybedroominalodging—houseinapoorstreetinLondon，andashisconsciousnessreturnedtohim，itsslowandreluctantmovingsconfrontedthesecondpointofview——markedbyenormousdifferences。Hehadnotslepttwoconsecutivehoursthroughthenight，andwhenhehadslepthehadbeentormentedbydrearydreams，whichweremorefullofmiserybecauseoftheirelusivevagueness，whichkepthistorturedbrainonawearyingstrainofefforttoreachsomedefiniteunderstandingofthem。Yetwhenheawakenedtheconsciousnessofbeingagainalivewasanawfulthing。

Ifthedreamscouldhavefadedintoblanknessandallhavepassedwiththepassingofthenight，howhecouldhavethankedwhatevergodstherebe！Onlynottoawake——

onlynottoawake！Buthehadawakened。

Theclockstrucknineashedidso，consequentlyheknewthehour。

Thelodging—houseslaveyhadarousedhimbycomingtolightthefire。Shehadsethercandleonthehearthanddoneherworkasstealthilyaspossible，buthehadbeendisturbed，thoughhehadmadeadesperateefforttostrugglebackintosleep。Thatwasnouse——nouse。Hewasawakeandhewasinthemidstofitallagain。

Withoutthesenseofluxuriouscomfortheopenedhiseyesandturneduponhisback，throwingouthisarmsflatly，sothathelayasintheformofacross，inheavywearinessandanguish。Formonthshehadawakenedeachmorningaftersuchanightandhadsolainlikeacrucifiedthing。

Ashewatchedthepainfulflickeringofthedampandsmokingwoodandcoalherememberedthisandthoughtthattherehadbeenalifetimeofsuchawakenings，notknowingthatthemorbidnessofafaggedbrainblottedoutthememoryofmorenormaldaysandtoldhimfantasticlieswhichwerebutahundredthparttruth。Hecouldseeonlythehundredthparttruth，anditassumedproportionssohugethathecouldseenothingelse。Insuchastatethehumanbrainisaninfernalmachineanditsworkingscanonlybeconqueredifthemortalthingwhichliveswithit——dayandnight，nightandday——haslearnedtoseparateitscontrollablefromitsseeminglyuncontrollableatoms，andcansilenceitsclamoronitswaytomadness。

AntonyDarthadnotlearnedthisthingandtheclamorhadhaditshideouswaywithhim。Physicianswouldhavegivenanametohismentalandphysicalcondition。Hehadheardthesenamesoften——appliedtomenthestrainofwhoseliveshadbeenlikethestrainofhisown，andhadleftthemasithadlefthim——

jaded，joyless，breakingthings。Someofthemhadbeenbrokenandhaddiedorweredraggingoutbruisedandtormenteddaysintheirownhomesorinmad—houses。Healwaysshudderedwhenheheardtheirnames，andrebelledwithsickfearagainstthemerementionofthem。Theyhadworkedashehadworked，theyhadbeenstrickenwiththedeliriumofaccumulation——accumulation——

ashehadbeen。Theyhadbeencaughtintherushandswirlofthegreatmaelstrom，andhadbeenborneroundandroundinit，untilhavinggraspedeverycovetedthingtossinguponitscirclingwaters，theythemselveshadbeenflungupontheshorewithbothhandsfull，therocksaboutthemstrewnwithrichpossessions，whiletheylayprostrateandgazedatalllifehadbroughtwithdull，hopeless，anguishedeyes。Heknew——iftheworstcametotheworst——

whatwouldbesaidofhim，becausehehadhearditsaidofothers。\"Heworkedtoohard——heworkedtoohard。\"Hewassickofhearingit。

Whatwaswrongwiththeworld——

whatwaswrongwithman，asMan——ifworkcouldbreakhimlikethis？

IfonebelievedinDeity，thelivingcreatureItbreathedintobeingmustbeaperfectthing——notonetobewearied，sickened，torturedbythelifeItsbreathinghadcreated。A

meremanwoulddisdaintobuildathingsopoorandincomplete。

Amerehumanengineerwhoconstructedanenginewhoseworkingswereperpetuallyatfault——whichwentwrongwhencalledupontodothelaboritwasmadefor——whowouldnotscoffatitandcastitasideasapieceofworthlessbungling？

\"Somethingiswrong，\"hemut—

tered，lyingflatuponhiscrossandstaringattheyellowhazewhichhadcreptthroughcranniesinwindow—

sashesintotheroom。\"Someoneiswrong。IsitI——orYou？\"

Histhinlipsdrewthemselvesbackagainsthisteethinamirthlesssmilewhichwaslikeagrin。

\"Yes，\"hesaid。\"Iamprettyfargone。IambeginningtotalktomyselfaboutGod。BryandiditjustbeforehewastakentoDr。Hewletts’

placeandcuthisthroat。\"

Hehadnotledaspeciallyevillife;hehadnotbrokenlaws，butthesubjectofDeitywasnotonewhichhisschemeofexistencehadincluded。Whenithadhauntedhimoflatehehadfeltitanuntowardandmorbidsign。Thethinghaddrawnhim——drawnhim;hehadcomplainedagainstit，hehadargued，sometimesheknew——shuddering——

thathehadraved。Somethinghadseemedtostandasideandwatchhisbeingandhisthinking。

Somethingwhichfilledtheuniversehadseemedtowait，andtohavewaitedthroughalltheeternalages，toseewhathe——oneman——woulddo。Attimesagreatappalledwonderhadsweptoverhimathisrealizationthathehadneverknownorthoughtofitbefore。Ithadbeentherealways——throughalltheagesthathadpassed。Andsometimes——

onceortwice——thethoughthadinsomeunspeakable，untranslatablewaybroughthimamoment’scalm。

Butatothertimeshehadsaidtohimself——withashiveringsoulcoweringwithinhim——thatthiswasonlypartofitallandwasabeginning，perhaps，ofreligiousmonomania。

Duringthelastweekhehadknownwhathewasgoingtodo——

hehadmadeuphismind。Thisabjecthorrorthroughwhichothershadletthemselvesbedraggedtomadnessordeathhewouldnotendure。Theendshouldcomequickly，andnooneshouldbesmittenaghastbyseeingorknowinghowitcame。

InthecrowdedshabbierstreetsofLondontherewerelodging—houseswhereone，bytakingprecautions，couldendhislifeinsuchamanneraswouldblothimoutofanyworldwheresuchamanashimselfhadbeenknown。Apistol，properlymanaged，wouldobliterateresemblancetoanyhumanthing。Monthsagothroughchancetalkhehadheardhowitcouldbedone——anddonequickly。

Hecouldleaveamisleadingletter。

Hehadplannedwhatitshouldbe——

thestoryitshouldtellofadisheartenedmediocreventurerofhispoorallreturningbankruptandhumiliatedfromAustralia，endingexistenceinsuchpennilessnessthattheparishmustgivehimapauper’sgrave。Whatdiditmatterwhereamanlay，sothatheslept——slept——

slept？Surelywithone’sbrainsscatteredonewouldsleepsoundlyanywhere。

Hehadcometothehousethenightbefore，dressedshabbilywiththepitiablerespectabilityofadefeatedman。Hehadentereddroopinglywithbentshouldersandhopelesshangofhead。Inhisownspherehewasamanwhoheldhimselfwell。Hehadletfallafewdispiritedsentenceswhenhehadengagedhisbackroomfromthewomanofthehouse，andshehadrecognizedhimasoneoftheluckless。

Infact，shehadhesitatedamomentbeforehisunreliablelookuntilhehadtakenoutmoneyfromhispocketandpaidhisrentforaweekinadvance。Shewouldhavethatatleastforhertrouble，hehadsaidtohimself。Heshouldnotoccupytheroomafterto—morrow。Inhisownhomesomedayswouldpassbeforehishouseholdbegantomakeinquiries。HehadtoldhisservantsthathewasgoingovertoParisforachange。Hewouldbesafeanddeepinhispauper’sgraveaweekbeforetheyaskedeachotherwhytheydidnothearfromhim。Allwasinorder。Oneofthemockingagonieswasthatlivingwasdonefor。Hehadceasedtolive。Work，pleasure，sun，moon，andstarshadlosttheirmeaning。Hestoodandlookedatthemostradiantlovelinessoflandandskyandseaandfeltnothing。

Successbroughtgreaterwealtheachdaywithoutstirringapulseofpleasure，evenintriumph。Therewasnothingleftbuttheawfuldaysandawfulnightstowhichheknewphysicianscouldgivetheirscientificname，buthadnohealingfor。Hehadgonefarenough。Hewouldgonofarther。To—morrowitwouldhavebeenoverlonghours。Andtherewouldhavebeennopublicdeclaimingoverthehumiliatingpitifulnessofhisend。Andwhatdiditmatter？

Howthickthefogwasoutside——

thickenoughforamantolosehimselfinit。Theyellowmistwhichhadcreptinunderthedoorsandthroughthecrevicesofthewindow—

sashesgaveaghostlylooktotheroom——aghastly，abnormallook，hesaidtohimself。Thefirewassmoulderinginsteadofblazing。Butwhatdiditmatter？Hewasgoingout。Hehadnotboughtthepistollastnight——likeafool。Somehowhisbrainhadbeensotiredandcrowdedthathehadforgotten。

\"Forgotten。\"Hementallyrepeatedthewordashegotoutofbed。

Bythistimeto—morrowheshouldhaveforgotteneverything。THIS

TIMETO—MORROW。Hismindrepeatedthatalso，ashebegantodresshimself。Whereshouldhebe？Shouldhebeanywhere？Supposeheawakenedagain——tosomethingasbadasthis？Howdidamangetoutofhisbody？Afterthecrashandshockwhathappened？DidonefindoneselfstandingbesidetheThingandlookingdownatit？Itwouldnotbeagoodthingtostandandlookdownon——evenforthatwhichhaddesertedit。Buthavingtornoneselfloosefromitanditsdevilishachesandpains，onewouldnotcare——onewouldseehowlittleitallmattered。Anythingelsemustbebetterthanthis——thethingforwhichtherewasascientificnamebutnohealing。Hehadtakenallthedrugs，hehadobeyedallthemedicalorders，andherehewasafterthatlasthellofanight——dressinghimselfinabackbedroomofacheaplodging—housetogooutandbuyapistolinthisdamnedfog。

Helaughedatthelastphraseofhisthought，thelaughwhichwasamirthlessgrin。

\"IamthinkingofitasifIwasafraidoftakingcold，\"hesaid。

\"Andto—morrow——！\"

TherewouldbenoTo—morrow。

To—morrowswereatanend。Nomorenights——nomoredays——nomoremorrows。

Hefinisheddressing，puttingonhisdiscriminatinglychosenshabby—

genteelclotheswithacarefortheeffectheintendedthemtoproduce。

Thecollarandcuffsofhisshirtwerefrayedandyellow，andhefastenedhiscollarwithapinandtiedhiswornnecktiecarelessly。Hisovercoatwasbeginningtowearagreenishshadeandlookthreadbare，sowashishat。

Whenhistoiletwascompletehelookedathimselfinthecrackedandhazyglass，bendingforwardtoscrutinizehisunshavenfaceundertheshadowofthedingyhat。

\"Itisallright，\"hemuttered。

\"ItisnotfartothepawnshopwhereIsawit。\"

Thestillnessoftheroomasheturnedtogooutwasuncanny。Asitwasabackroom，therewasnostreetbelowfromwhichcouldarisesoundsofpassingvehicles，andthethicknessofthefogmuffledsuchsoundasmighthavefloatedfromthefront。Hestoppedhalf—waytothedoor，notknowingwhy，andlistened。

Towhat——forwhat？Thesilenceseemedtospreadthroughallthehouse——outintothestreets——

throughallLondon——throughalltheworld，andhetostandinthemidstofit，amanonthewaytoDeath——withnoTo—morrow。

Whatdiditmean？Itseemedtomeansomething。Theworldwithdrawn——lifewithdrawn——soundwithdrawn——breathwithdrawn。Hestoodandwaited。Perhapsthiswasoneofthesymptomsofthemorbidthingforwhichtherewasthatname。Ifsohehadbettergetawayquicklyandhaveitover，lesthebefoundwanderingaboutnotknowing——notknowing。Butnowheknew——theSilence。Hewaited——waitedandtriedtohear，asifsomethingwascallinghim——callingwithoutsound。Itreturnedtohim——thethoughtofThatwhichhadwaitedthroughalltheagestoseewhathe——oneman——woulddo。

Hehadneverexactlypitiedhimselfbefore——hedidnotknowthathepitiedhimselfnow，buthewasamangoingtohisdeath，andalight，coldsweatbrokeoutonhimanditseemedasifitwasnothewhodidit，butsomeother——heflungouthisarmsandcriedaloudwordshehadnotknownhewasgoingtospeak。

\"Lord！Lord！WhatshallIdotobesaved？\"

ButtheSilencegavenoanswer。

ItwastheSilencestill。

Andafterstandingafewmomentspanting，hisarmsfellandhisheaddropped，andturningthehandleofthedoor，hewentouttobuythepistol。

II

Ashewentdownthenarrowstaircase，coveredwithitsdingyandthreadbarecarpet，hefoundthehousesofullofdirtyyellowhazethatherealizedthatthefogmustbeoftheextraordinaryoneswhicharerememberedinafter—yearsasabnormalspecimensoftheirkind。Herecalledthattherehadbeenoneofthesortthreeyearsbefore，andthattrafficandbusinesshadbeenalmostentirelystoppedbyit，thataccidentshadhappenedinthestreets，andthatpeoplehavinglosttheirwayhadwanderedaboutturningcornersuntiltheyfoundthemselvesfarfromtheirintendeddestinationsandobligedtotakerefugeinhotelsorthehousesofhospitablestrangers。Curiousincidentshadoccurredandoddstoriesweretoldbythosewhohadfeltthemselvesobligedbycircumstancestogooutintothebafflinggloom。

Heguessedthatsomethingofalikenaturehadfallenuponthetownagain。Thegas—lightonthelandingsandinthemelancholyhallburnedfeebly——sofeeblythatonegotbutavagueviewofthericketyhat—standandtheshabbyovercoatsandhead—gearhanginguponit。Itwaswellforhimthathehadbutacornerorsototurnbeforehereachedthepawnshopinwhosewindowhehadseenthepistolheintendedtobuy。

Whenheopenedthestreet—doorhesawthatthefogwas，uponthewhole，perhapsevenheavierandmoreobscuring，ifpossible，thantheonesowellremembered。Hecouldnotseeanythingthreefeetbeforehim，hecouldnotseewithdistinctnessanythingtwofeetahead。Thesensationofsteppingforwardwasuncertainandmysteriousenoughtobealmostappalling。Amannotsufficientlycautiousmighthavefallenintoanyopenholeinhispath。AntonyDartkeptascloselyaspossibletothesidesofthehouses。Itwouldhavebeeneasytowalkoffthepavementintothemiddleofthestreetbutfortheedgesofthecurbandthestepdownwardfromitslevel。Traffichadalmostabsolutelyceased，thoughinthemoreimportantstreetslink—

boysweremakingeffortstoguidemenorfour—wheelersslowlyalong。

Theblindfeelingofthethingwasratherawful。Thoughbutfewpedestrianswereout，Dartfoundhimselfonceortwicebrushingagainstorcomingintoforciblecontactwithmenfeelingtheirwayaboutlikehimself。

\"Oneturntotheright，\"herepeatedmentally，\"twototheleft，andtheplaceisatthecorneroftheothersideofthestreet。\"

Hemanagedtoreachitatlast，butithadbeenaslow，andtherefore，longjourney。Allthegas—jetsthelittleshopownedwerelighted，butevenundertheirflarethearticlesinthewindow——theoneortwooncecheaplygaudydressesandshawlsandmen’sgarments——hunginthehazelikethedreary，danglingghostsofthingsrecentlyexecuted。

Amongwatchesandforlornpiecesofold—fashionedjewelryandoddsandends，thepistollayagainstthefoldsofadirtygauzeshawl。Thereitwas。Itwouldhavebeenannoyingifsomeoneelsehadbeenbeforehandandhadboughtit。